Friday, July 8, 2011

The Chapter That Almost Wasn't

After what seems like forever, I decided to write a new blog entry.  I haven't been remiss in my updates because of my busy schedule or for lack of material.  Instead, I've been hesitating over my keyboard trying to decide how to narrow down the long list of topics swirling around in my head, and the one topic I keep coming back to would be the final chapter for this particular blog.

My sweet, smart and sometimes overly-opinionated Wassachusetts was giving me more training issues than I'd bargained for when I initially settled my mind on buying a young, green thoroughbred with a racing history.  Over the past two and a half years, I've run out of patience with the high-intensity rides and his explosive tendencies.  I've lost my courage and have a hard time trying to reestablish my trust in him.  Anyone who knows horses, knows that this is a lethal combination that can potentially ruin both horse and rider.

During one recent lesson, my wise-and-all-knowing trainer instructed me to push Wassachusetts forward and into the bridle, therefore preventing his ability to bolt or carry-on like a semi-wild orangutan, but as I laid my leg on his side and felt him tighten his back muscles and surge forward, I decided I'd had it with this horse.  I pulled him up and announced that I was not going to be run away with today.  No way, no how!

I was more frustrated and angry with myself than with the horse.  Quite frankly, I was downright pissed at myself for not having the stones to ride through his tantrums and nonsense.  Wasn't I a better rider than that?  Apparently not.

By the end of the day, I convinced myself of a lot of things like: I need a smaller horse since my 5'3" frame seems lost and overwhelmed on a 16.2-hand horse; I need a quieter horse that would be less of a challenge; I need to sell this horse. It was this last thought that really stuck.

I filled my trainer's daughter in on my concerns and had her agree to do a few training rides on Wassachusetts.  Much to my ego's relief, she agreed that he was not a particularly easy horse to ride.  This sentiment was echoed by my trainer that not everyone could ride my sometimes fiery beast and that, in short, she had every confidence that I possessed the necessary skills to manage his training highs and lows.  While I still have my doubts, I caved on my decision to sell and - literally- got back on the horse.

It's hard to tell what will happen over the next few months, but thanks to the 90 degree heat and humidity, Wassachusetts has been that quiet, responsive horse I was pining for.  Will he stay this way?  Of course not.  But I can't help but wonder, if I slog through these tough times, will I have that nice, well-trained, quiet horse in a few years?  I guess I'll just have to take it one chapter at a time.

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